Show Me Another Way

No one ever said this message

Would be an easy thing to carry

That this path I’ve chosen to follow,

This calling,

Wouldn’t bury

Old friendships

Not serving.

It’s a new day,

A new decade

Where the old charades

No longer hold true

‘Just for the sake of’…

Habit.

My heart is aching,

Breaking

With what my mind labels ‘indifference’,

But with what my soul knows as ‘Truth’:

The way things are supposed to be.

Where events

Connections
Are ripped

Right out from underneath

My experience

Too soon,

But on time….

Divinity’s time that is…

Definitely not mine.

Ya see, it seems

I want the things,

People

Subconsciously

That are bad for me,

Still,

That kill,

But fading

Because I like it,

I’m comfortable,

When it hurts

Simultaneously

Attracting

Premeditated pain

Exacting

Medicating

My focus strained

Show me another way,

I pray.

Shed these meaningless past times

And soften my gaze

With the grace of faith

Kiss my cheeks

With Mercy’s melody

And lay me in a bed of

Petals

His arms..

Anything soft

To ease my heart

Sore..

Broken..

Mending..

Slowly..

Time..

Peace..

Let it be....

'Christmas Eve 09'

NEW PLAYLIST..HIT THE PLAY BUTTON TO YOUR RIGHT AND READ ALONG!

I’ve opted out of Christmas Eve celebration today.  My heart is heavy and yet light as though something new is but on the horizon of my experience.  And perhaps it is happening already, and perhaps I’m too much in yesterday and what was to realize it's here, NOW is here.  It’s almost like I’m going forward and backwards at the same time.  It’s almost like these rhymes don’t flow like they used to and I’m still focused on then to see how they lace the page now.  It’s like a dream, this life, and though it seems at times to be meaningful in it’s stillness, still it flows onward with less meaning than I thought while more and more ‘I want, I do, I am’.  With our without me, going like the tide and coming back as the birds that fly south.  The mouth of my existence eating each connection whole, I dwell in the rawness of flavor each second I let him in….side.  To hide not one inch of my Truth, soothing the inconsistency with verse as but my only piece of matterless matter to cling to in these times of uncertainty.  But isn’t it grand? The not knowing; you’d think someone like me would be used to it by now.  ‘Someone like me’, like who?  A stereotyped cue…lol!  Laughing in the mirror..  Random flow… to be continued...

Resurrection

I wanted you.

I craved you

Every molecule in my being danced around your tune.

You lied to me.

Lie to me still.

Tell me what I want to hear so I can find tranquility inside all that is not and is. Catch me in your riffs, minor chords, majorly changing my harmonies along the Staff Book of Life. Lay down baby, allow me to lyrically define what you can’t see, yet. Let me taste you and relay the sensations in verse cursing me a new addiction, for I want you, and still. Let’s kill the past with new melodies, turn off the radio and make a genre all our own. Break me down, again and again and take the sound out of this past and place the silence instead onto a plane presenting a naked honor, where truth but stains the sheets. Where I stand blind to any kind of inhibition and false conditioning of moral. With but a pen in hand. As your every dream is but a color on your palette, I give to you my body, a canvas. Do what you will. Write your legacy upon my lips and grace my flower with your source. Set the course of which I will obey, then in your will, run astray about my path of divinity. For I see the perfection of our maker in your eyes, transposing my petite poise within your symphony. Take me deeper into your piece. Show me a peace. Let me know a new elegance and play the game of kiss and tell no longer. Attach my form to the fragrance of your breath. Seduce my passion emanating, translating fear until this envelope of erotica sticks no longer by Lust’s spit but releases the raw soothing ooze of spiritual succulence…

Oh lie to me still!

For I want you…

To want me..

I’m waiting…

I’m craving..

…only you…

Love's funny

Love’s a funny thing. Past loves coming back into the current, presently re-presenting what was on a palette no longer of confusion. I let the moisture of my tongue slip back into the thoughts and emotions that once graced my plane. I taste old flavors renewed and remember why and how I fell in the first place, recalling the person I was then and the priorities or lack there of, and laugh...because I remember.

I remember the late nights and raving lights, the beach dances and virgin romances, the shameless proclamations and games and ranting phases of lust and love and passion, everlasting, even now. It was what you see on the screen, it was my living dream, nightmare at times, but mine. And yours 'cause you wanted in the game too. Where there was nothing to lose, yet everything was at stake. “Going to bed? Nah, stayin’ up late. Kiss me goodnight then leave me alone, why didn’t you call, what, you’re not going home? You’re driving me crazy, just give me a hit, oh you want some more? I’m over it. But he’s just a friend, and what did she want?"  Adolescence is funny, flipping flavors on the flaunt…of you and me…

Yes..

Love’s a funny thing…

Even crazy.